RHONJ FAMILY ADVICE JERSEY STYLE!
10 Do's and Dont's of Jersey
DO's
1. Tell your husband when you are fighting with your cousin so he can surprise you with a brand new car!
2. When singing Amazing Grace in front of millions of viewers substitute the word "wench" for wretch
3. Always bring a bodyguard to all Posche Parties you never know who you'll end up fighting
4.When dressing your children make sure to match them perfectly outfits, hair bows, purses, all accessories
5. Be sure to have a Botox party when introducing yourself to family of your new friends
6. Praise your children when they have great ideas ( like opening a car wash/ strip club)
7.Bring all family and friends to the consultation when you are getting a "Boob Job"
8. Buy your daughter a car even when she misbehaves and do it without consulting with your wife first
9. Make enough food/desserts to feed a third world country for weeks when having immediate family over
10. Make sure your guests enjoy a mechanical bull ride before a Holiday meal!
DONT'S
1. Don't arrive on time for ANY family functions you are invited to but always get really angry with others when they are late arriving to your family function!
2. Don't get along with everyone in the family it just isn't normal
3. Never leave the house without a cat burglar hat.
4. Never allow yourself to become friends with anyone named Kim ( they can't be trusted)
5. Never meet a man or know his full name before you start having regular phone sex with him!
6. Never use any other color to decorate your bathroom with besides GOLD
7. Never buy anything unless it is really expensive and completely over the top!
8. Don't trust anyone who isn't Italian (or connected somehow)!
9. Never marry into a family without someone with the name "Joe" (or "Tony" )
10. Never show yourself in public without mounds of make up and spray tan!
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| Teresa and Melissa and The "Joes" |
Everyone loves the gorgeous Jersey Girls. We just wanted to have a little fun with them. Whether you are Team Teresa or Team Caroline
or anyone one in between we are all Team Jersey Housewives and we can't wait to see what the "Fabulicious" ladies will do next. Tune in Sunday nights on Bravo to see the Real Housewives of New Jersey. If you want a little sneak peak of past episodes click on one of the You Tube videos next to this post. One or more of them is always showing The Real Housewives of New Jersey along with a number of other amazing video clips from You Tube. Stop back to visit again at : http://goodadviceguru.blogspot.com/ or if you have a question or comment you like to share you can always email me at 1goodadviceguru@gmail.com . Thanks for visiting! Come back soon!
Love them all but Melissa and Joe (Gorga)...I liked the show much more without them! Melissa is so phony! LOVE, LOVE, LOVE Teresa and Joe!!!
ReplyDeleteToo bad Teresa doesn't know how to take advice..Love Melissa and Joe Gorga!! Thanks to them the show is more enjoyable!!
ReplyDeleteNot a fan of Melissa and her husband. Melissa is an attention hog. I love the other ladies. Teresa is clearly a target this season.
ReplyDeleteI can't stand Melissa and Joe Gorga they sure do think they are inocent in all the problems. And all those fake tears Melissa cried to her husband about how she just wants him to be close to his family she sure was a b¡7%# to Teresa during there talk trying to play all in inocent. But I luv luv the rest of the cast that is the original cast that is!!!! And I'm soooo happy daniele is gone!!!!
ReplyDeleteTeam everyone but Melissa. She reminds me of a little junior highschool girl starving for attention. She should be on the Jersey Shore instead of Real Housewives. Just saying
ReplyDeleteTaking a quote from Caroline "OWN IT" and there is nothing yoU'll need to fight about. NO ONE takes accountability for what they've done or said and are so quick to blame everyone else for their short comings! DISGUSTING!
ReplyDeleteTeam Teresa!! Yes Melissa is so two face. Doesn't she know people will hear what she says on TV? Then goes on and play "oh poor me" yeah right. I don't feel bad for her phony ass.
ReplyDeleteWarts and all I love them all EXCEPT Melissa. Singer? Don't quit your day job. Beauty? Beady little eyes and a forgettable face. Joe G.? Serious issues all around.
ReplyDeleteIts weird how joe says to melissa I'm yor dad and husband I have heard him say he is her dad every show just weird!!! Melissa is as fake as they come I love evryone else cathey not sure about.
ReplyDelete